"there are no conditions on my loving you. I will always love you no matter what you do or do not do, who you become, or what happens." -sjh

Upcoming Events

So, a lot going on.
Next Friday, sister in-laws birthday party at The Salsa Room in DC and visiting my dog.
Friday after that, party with my old highschool friends with a catch- no lights and everyone must bring their own flashlight to see.
A few weeks later, art auction with chance of being featured in a magazine.
heck yeah

visiting VA

I'm at the in-laws house right now. Mom and Dad in-law are out of town but Scott and I are hangin with Angela. I saw the last of the Harry Potter saga this morning. What's sad is the only other Harry Potter movie I've seen is The Deathly Hallows: Part 1.
It's great seeing Mozart. Tomorrow Scott and I are going to ikea to get some organizational furniture. Whenever I try to tidy up the apartment it gets to the point where it's simply a fact that we don't have storage. How can you put something away if there's no where to put it?
Mozart and Chippy are both at the end of my bed right now as I write this post. I guess the only reason i'm posting at all is to remember this time. I feel badly that Scott had to drive. I'm looking forward to being able to help. I have a lot on my mind. I want to have a nervous breakdown and just go nuts. I have so much cooped up inside and so much self-control I am putting into practice. I have so much rage inside that I cannot express. So much worry, sadness, wishes, dreams, hopes, wants, grievances, and much much MUCH more. Well, here is as good of any a place to stop. I'm sad we won't be getting Mozart back as the best birthday present ever like I had thought originally. We are renewing the lease. I am accepting it because I have no other choice. -Laura

Serenity Prayer- St. Augustine

Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

Radical Acceptence

we are not moving out of the apartment complex meaning that I will not be getting my dog back like I thought I would be. We are going to talk to the manager when renewing the lease but if they say no we are staying here nonetheless. I feel very overwhelmed right now. There are so many changes coming at me and I have to accept them all. Not only are there changes coming at me, there are changes that I must put into motion. I'm literally living one breath at a time.
Even though I feel very sad and overwhelmed and tired I know I am blessed. I am still happy... Emotions are complex. I love God. I love my husband. wish me luck

surprise party

Today I went to a surprise party that my friend Leo planned for his wife of 30 years. He called her his beautiful bride. I think it's amazing when a couple is together for 30 years and the woman is still his "bride". I hope my husband thinks of me as his bride forever. I love my husband.

In other news, been thinking about the whole future thing. What can I say... my head hurts.

Good night world,
Laura

Decisions

I came to the conclusion last night that the reason I'm having such a hard time find direction for my life is that so many sources are telling me so many different things. It's like I had too many applications open on my computer, got the blue screen of death, and I need to force quit, lose documents and information, reboot, and start with a clean slate. No opinions, no judgements, no advice.

Things to think about:

Turn my art into a career along with working full time at the church

Become an author (i'm thinking starting with a children's book or a book that tells a story with just pictures)

Go to school for a degree for a job that needs a degree

How to be a better wife